another death ... and it's not me

A dear friend's sister committed suicide sometime between yesterday and today. She went out yesterday "to buy cards" and never came back. They found her today.

I feel terrible for my friend, though the sister has a history of attempts, so it wasn't out of nowhere. Does that make it easy? No, certainly not, but perhaps a bit less startling than if it had come out of nowhere.

But I'm in a stage now where, whenever I hear of someone dying, a thought that always runs through my head is, "It wasn't me." Not that I'm expecting it to be me. But still ... it wasn't me.